Uncertain Rules Apply
by Hu Edith
Summary: Typical, cliche, overdone, girl goes to YuYu Hakusho world...perhaps. Overdone love interest...not so much. Edna Link goes to the YuYu Hakusho world in all typical fanfiction fanfare, check! The twist on the overdone story, check! Ma! Let's go, m'kay?
1. U R A In Japan Now

So, shoot me, I must be off my rocker. Well, the floor must be comfy if I'm off the rocker.

This is the typical, cliché, overdone, girl going into the YuYu Hakusho world. Sorry, I lost your attention at those words, didn't I? Well, let me change that up a bit. The romantic focus of the story is not the typical one of Kurama and Hiei. It is Kuwabara. That got your attention. And probably got all the Kuwabara haters to hiss at me like angry cats.

I'm sorry. After a while of reading some very good pieces of people defending Kuwabara, I had to wonder why they are not going the distance and doing what they say. Fanfiction writers do put focus on Kurama and Hiei, even more on Yusuke than Kuwabara. (I'm only looking at the main four here) The Kuwabarettes (Well, I call myself a Kuwabarette so whatever, continue) complain and say there is too much focus on the other teammates but they never make a story with Kuwabara as the focus. I love what they do in defending him, I really do, I am not downplaying their awesomeness factor for doing so.

So I am going to do the unthinkable because Kuwabara is my favorite and I am never able to read stories like this about him. I am going to write a Kuwabara/OC.

Confession: Being off my rocker is kind of fun.

* * *

"Because two can keep a secret…if one of them is dead."

I hummed a bit and peered about a large tree. These woods were so peaceful. I glanced behind and made a mental note of where I turned, least I get lost in the state park.

"Got a secret, can you keep it, gunna take it to the grave?"

I paused and bit at a sleeved thumb. "Is that how the song goes? Moooe, chit! I can't remember."

Something cracked and I froze as there were crashing noises. Quickly, I looked about the woods and hid behind a tree, facing away from where the noise came from. The thing zoomed past and I watched its back as it continued running through the woods. And then it smashed into air and fell to the ground.

I blinked and stepped forward. "Ka? Honto?" I tilted my head as it looked back to see me. I stared at the face and tilted my head the other way. "But I live in Iowa, not Japan." I pointed at the gapping face and sang, "One of these things just ain't like the others, one of these things just don't belong, one of these things just ain't like the others, and one of these things is you."

The face still gapped at me.

"Oh!" I leapt my way forward and held a hand out. "Here, I'll help you up."

"Naw, that's okay…"

He stood up on his own and I scowled at him for not accepting my hand up. "Yanno, you really don't belong here." I peered up at the taller guy. "Say…how old are you?"

"…Eighteen," he managed out. Then he jumped and pointed at me. "Wait a minute! Just who are you!?"

"Moooe, I thought you looked older," I commented. I glanced back to the trees, remembering the fallen tree I had turned left at. I looked back up to his bewildered face and pointed with a sleeved finger. "Did you need to get back on the path? I can help, yes I can."

I began to walk back in the direction I came from, pitying how my exploration would have to wait. "You put one foot in front of the other and soon you'll be walking cross the floor. You put one foot in front of the other and soon you'll be walking out the door." I hopped my booted feet to the beat and half danced my way forward. However, I did not hear another pair of feet and turned around to see where he was as I continued to walk…backwards.

"Come on, I'll show you how to get back onto the path. Yanno…you speak English rather well. How many years did it take you to—eeep!"

I had run into something and I stumbled my way forward in a jump, arms stuck out. He raced forward to late to do anything as I had already caught myself.

"Ma! I'm good, I'm good! What'd I run into? There shouldn't be a tree there." I turned around and blinked as I was correct. I rose up a sleeved hand and slowly reached out to… "Ooo! Ma! That's what you ran into! Air! Ha ha, that's great. I always _love_ it when elements go mental on me."

"Are you okay miss?"

I clasped my hands together onto my knees and leaned forward with a grin. "Peachy! Peachy fucking keen mister! As the elements have gone mental on me, I think we are both properly lost now! Hee!" I stood back up and waved my hand up and down in a dismissive matter. "See? Peachy fucking keen as Courtney would say."

He blinked and jerked a thumb backwards. "Lost? No. Master Genkai's temple is back that way."

I stare and blink back. "Nani? Excuse me; I must have sweet potatoes lodged in my ears." I dug my pointer fingers into my ears and quickly cleaned them out. "Now, be kind to my denial and repeat that to what I'm sure you did not just say."

"Uh… Master Genkai's temple is back that way?"

"Ma! You are supposed to be kind to my denial and not say that again! Repeat! This time, be kind like I know you are and repeat what I'm sure you did not just say both times."

He scowled at me. "Look. I don't know what you're on about, but Master Genkai's temple is back this way. You're the thing that is not like the others and doesn't belong. This is Japan, not…Iowa did you say. Where's Iowa? Sounds familiar… Oh! The States!?!?!?!"

"You're the one who's in Iowa mister. Backbone State Park to be exact. One of the oldest parks of Iowa. This is not some…Dark Forest!"

He blinked. "Uh, ya, it actually is the Dark Forest. I felt that," he pointed to the mental air, "from Master Genkai's Temple and came running to see what came outta it."

I huffed and poked at the mental air. "Shouldn't I be able to go back through the mental air?"

"Not if someone's blocking it… Oye! Don't be kicking it now!"

I kicked the mental air again, kind of just enjoying the way the air vibrated at this point. "Moooe. Such a nasty someone making the air go mental on me. You are pretty nasty too. I ask for kindness on my denial and you do not do so. Could you at least make the nasty someone making the air go mental stop somehow? Mmm? Please?"

He scratched behind his neck and laughed nervously. Slowly, he looked over to where the mental air was. "Maybe, if it was another dimension. But you say you're from the States, a place of this world and dimension. So, I cannot say if I can bust down a transportation barrier. Not for sure, but I will give it my all miss! Wah!"

"Eeep! Ma! Some warning," I yell at him as bright orange licks out from his hands. "Chit! That just feels real nice! Your sword thing, that. Yosh! Cut it down with your sword thing mister! Cut it down!"

He braced himself, bright orange sword searing from his hands, face determined. "All right! Kaaaaaah!"

The bright orange sword hit the mental air and the mental air gave in, he pushed the sword farther into the dent. And then the mental air lashed back and he flew backwards onto his head.

"Ma! Are you okay?" I raced over and held out my hand again. With a shake of his head, he opted to stand up without help and gave the mental air a fierce look.

"Let's try this again! Kaaaaah!" He ran toward the mental air, jumped, slashed his sword, and the mental air lashed outwards. Once more, he flew backwards, this time into a tree.

"Moooe. You fail? I cannot return to Iowa?" I look over at him as he stood up and shook his head to clear it. "Ma!" I clapped my hands together. "Well, I suppose I should find other means through plane or such. So how far is Master Genkai's Temple?"

"Oh no! I, Kazuma Kuwabara, do not give up that easily! I will break it for you miss! Kaaaaaah!"

I calmly watched as he flew backwards again from the mental air lashing back. Before he can run at the mental air again, I take his arm. "I give up easily on this option. It is not in you to break the mental air down with your sword thing. That's okay. This option is to be given up on, but there are other ways to get me back to Iowa so you are not giving up really at all. See?"

"But I can—"

"Ka, you are stubborn Kazuma! I admire, but let us go to Master Genkai's Temple and convene to figure out another way for me to get back to Iowa. Ne?"

He blinked. "Uh, right. Master Genkai's Temple is this way. Er, what's your name?"

I keep my arm linked with his and continue walking next to him as he leads me to Master Genkai's Temple through the Dark Forest of all forests, really. "Moooe. Right, my name. My name is Edna Link."

"Edna Link?"

"Hai," I replied. "Some just call me Ed or Eddie, feel free to do so because Edna is an old name. I was named after my grandmother, Edna Fisher."

He blinked. "Okay… But isn't Link your family name, surname?"

I nodded.

"I'll just call you Link," he said. His face brightened. "Like the video game!"

"No," I snapped out. "Not like the video game! Chit! This is another reason why I prefer to be called Ed or Eddie by people. So call me by one of those two please Kazuma, m'kay? Or come up with your own nickname for me, that's all good too."

"Uh… Well, on the topic then, I prefer Kuwabara. Especially lately." He glanced down at the topic and then gazed back over to me to see if I would agree to call him by his last name.

"Moooe. Well, then. I will just call you my little Kookaburra bird! Neither your first nor last name."

He frowned. "Uh… Kookaburra bird?"


	2. U R A Gay And Happy Bird

Well, the continued bit of me being off my rocker goes on for a second chapter. Now if somebody can build me the said rocker, I will gladly not be on it. Along with me not being on it, Edna Link will not be on it as well. She's part of me and equally crazy. Don't mind her. All crazy, mental people talk funny and make up their own sounds. Then again, Kuwabara makes the strangest sounds somehow and it's amazing how well he pulls off not looking mental. Except to Hiei. And sometimes Yusuke.

Irony: I kind of know what it means. You say it like "I-run-knee". Like, I say I'm off my rocker but I, in fact, do not have a rocker. I really wish I did though and could put a pillow on the back of the chair that says,"I am currently off my rocker". This way one could read it if I were in fact not on my rocker, but if I were on my rocker...the reader would not know any better as I am hiding the words. Bwahahaha. That would be one wicked awesome rocker pillow.

* * *

"Uh… I'll bring in some tea. You can take a seat here until then."

I shook my head and set my boots down on the floor. I grin over at him. "That's okay my little Kookaburra bird. This temple is way amazing. I'm gunna look around."

He scratched his check. "That's okay I suppose. Just stay in this room for now. I'll be back in a few minutes, okay?"

Nodding, I took a short run and slid on my socks across the floor. "Gomen. Had to do it. Too much fun. Go on then. I've never had tea before; it'll be nice to try some."

He gave a grin. "Now's your chance to try some then! Yukina—!" Abruptly he stopped and glanced down. He threw up a fist, giving an impressive stance and grin. "Hee hee! Yukina makes the _best_ tea! Just you wait and see!"

He ran off and I hurriedly tip toed over to the door. This was interesting. Did something happen between my little Kookaburra bird and Yukina? I grinned to myself. "Hee. Always wanted to call his character that 'cause he's the humor guy but a great guy. Kuwabara sits in the old gum tree… But it's not right when he's forcing a laugh out. Then you know something is really wrong. Ma! I'll just have to have fun in my little dream world. I cannot really be in Japan."

I glanced back around and eyed over the room. It was the same room set up as the one movie. Two pillows (were they called pillows?) sat on the floor—one for him and one for me. Really, I had to wonder who had sat on these pillows before.

"…Chit. No, plane out shit. Shit. Yusuke Urameshi could have farted on that pillow. Not so much the fart bit, although he probably would have, but Yusuke Urameshi could have sat there. Strangeness!"

I poked at the two pillows and briefly wondered if I should write on one of them, claiming it mine so no one could fart on it.

"Wait. I'm here. Dream world or not, I could be on camera like the show! If it is a dream, it is my dream, so what if I look an idiot? If it isn't a dream, then I cannot be labeled crazy as it is a show…"

I rushed over to the sliding door and stood facing the inside of the room. "Right. There should be the camera of when Kurama entered in during the movie thing, straight in front of me. Hello viewers! I apologize if you are Japanese but English does seem to be popular to learn here, so hopefully you do understand all I say. If not, well, it doesn't matter then, ne? I am Edna Link, some character of this story. I do not know if I am the main character, though if I am dreaming, then of course I am the main character… Anyway, I am 17 years old and supposed to be in Iowa…but oddly enough, I'm in Japan. In Master Genkai's Temple of all places. With Kazuma Kuwabara apparently. And Yukina somewhere is making tea for me. …Yukina's making tea for me!?!"

Laughing, I wave to the camera or just act like an idiot in my own dream, and race off down the hallway.

"YUKINA! Oh, Yukina!"

Oh, person! I skidded and ran around them. "Gomen," I yelled out behind me. Then I spotted Kazuma looking around a doorway up ahead. "Hey!"

"Er... I thought I asked you to stay in there."

"Awww, Kookaburra bird... I don't stay in one place for very long. Sa! Where's Yukina?"

I look around expectedly and grinned as I saw Yukina around Kazuma. Found her! And then I could feel my smile freeze. I pointed at the smaller girl.

"That's not right! I know I'm probably one of the few fans that approve of this but, why isn't Kazuma hugging you!? Why is Jin hugging you!?"

I pause and Kazuma begins to motion for me to leave. Jin's wide blue eyes were blinking curiously at me. Oh yeah... I was speaking English and I am currently in Japan. But I would think Jin could speak English for the whole Irish accent thing... Yukina said something in Japanese; I should get Kookaburra bird to translate later, and handed the tea tray to him. The tray pressed into my back.

"We should talk in the other room and figure this out," he said pointedly and then called back a loud thank you to Yukina over his shoulder. At least I know the Japanese for that one.

"Ma. That's some irony though to the fans of Yukina and Touya getting together. Honto?"

Kazuma led me back down the hallway. "Yes, really. And we really need to talk now."

He closed the sliding door behind them, setting down the tea tray, and then looked up with narrowed eyes at me. "How do you know Jin and Touya?"

I blinked and remembered the pillow. Oh yeah, I forgot to grab a marker to mark my own pillow so no one like Yusuke could fart on it. I doubt Jin or Touya would do that... Okay, so, Jin seemed a likely candidate to do that as well but he would probably blow it away.

"Okay, my little Kookaburra bird, I need a permanent marker for my pillow so no one else can sit and fart on it. Then I want you to steal some robes from Kurama because obsessive fan girls will make me rich off of E-Bay. And some headbands from Hiei. Top prizes if you can manage to steal me some undergarments. I'll split half with you and you can spend your money being a rich man and laughing at fan girls who hate you. Ma! Don't worry. I cannot be the only fan who appreciates your character. Moooe. But should I apologize to you right now? My favorite character is Hiei. Probably because he plays tough guy and threatens people and seems so easy to tease. Hee!"

"Uhhhh. Fan girls? Character? Wait! You LIKE shorty!!!???"

I burst out into laughter. "Ma! That was too good of a face NOT to say it! Ohhh! I can do better than that though, yes I can!"

I must admit, the face he was making just goaded me on. Who could not laugh at the many faces of Kazuma Kuwabara? He looked all sorts of frightened.

"The fans don't like pairing you up with Yukina much. Search fan based stories long enough and you'll see that they prefer you to be gay and a bit too friendly with your teammates if you get my drift. Which then I must say they are idiots. Ka! Idiots, yes indeed! You played hooky because Yusuke made you dream about giving him a kiss of life where he was glowing golden and everything! Don't worry, the very bad nickname among the fans I will never say to you Kazuma! You're my little Kookaburra bird!"

I paused and then realized the words of the song. Laughing nervously I restated, "Where gay means happy, the proper use of the word."

He sputtered. And he screamed. And beat his head with fists. "I'm older now! And my mind is--! That's advanced mental anguish and it ain't leaving my head! I'm not--! I'm totally into girls! I never had that dream with Yusuke! Why would anyone think we were--!"

I nodded solemnly and raised a finger. "Nor with any other teammates. Even if some of your high school girls mistakenly thought you and Kurama were dating. Or even, the rated M fan based stories staring you and Hiei. Sometimes I wish there was good smut in the fan-based world that was guy and girl and not so much guy on guy action. Maybe its the whole more forbidden thing and so the writers pull out all the strings that hold them back from writing similar smut from the far more traditional sense. Um... Kookaburra bird?"

Perhaps I went overboard I thought as I looked down at Kazuma's swirling eyes.

"Ma! Oh well! Probably will scare him into believing what I say on him being a character from a manga and anime show. I'll be sure to do that when he wakes up anyway... Oops. I should have explained now. Why did I get off subject anyway?"

Let's see, there was the whole fan based stories and bad pairings, hooky, too good not to say it, he screamed something about me liking 'Shorty', I made fun of Hiei's tease ablity, rich man, E-Bay, obsessed fan girls, undergarments, farts...

"Ha! I got off subject because he set down the tea tray next to the pillows and marking my territory had gone momentarily forgotten. Hum, I still need a permanent marker too. And Kookaburra here needs to be conscious so I can tell him how he was invented by some fat dude's head! I should make that sound better... Invented by the dude who married the chick who created Sailor Scouts? Sounds better."

So I went running back down the hallway screaming for Yukina hoping she could understand pantomime.


End file.
